If you’re struggling with this I highly recommend reading come as you are. It’s a relatively quick read and great at helping understand a woman’s sexuality.
Not my current situation but anytime I stopped wanting to have sex with someone it was either because something else important was bothering me or because the relationship wasn’t emotionally fulfilling anymore / in the time period.
In a previous relationship, the sex was treated like an absolute requirement. I think there were red flags posing as jokes in the beginning, then he got comfortable enough to say “as long as you’ll have sex with me whenever I want, I won’t want to leave you. “
Romantic in a toxic way.
Anyway, started bringing him lunch at his work and he kept just wanting to do it in the car. Fun occasionally, but not everyday, and not when it loses the sexy spontaneous appeal. Told him I thought we were in a healthy enough part in our relationship that I could say “no, I don’t want to have sex right now.” And have it be cool.
Opened my eyes to the fact my boundaries were not respected in the relationship.
I am single now, but this has happened in a few relationships. Always when he stopped working on the relationship or bad external stuff was happening (death in the family, extreme work situation, etc.).
My partner became an alcoholic asshole who never apologized for anything. I knew sex was extremely important to him as apologies and feeling valued were to me. It was hard to forgive without it so I was angry all the time and didn’t feel attracted to him. I felt that if I had sex with him he would assume I forgave him and all was right with our relationship.