Just keep trying. There’s no one answer you have to keep pushing. I realized suicide would be the end I would miss out on so much. The cons of suicide vastly out weigh the pros. I still have suicidal thoughts and want to give you almost everyday but the fact that I am here can attest to my will. The same with you
The universe won’t let you out.
I guess it depends on what you are feeling. Thinking about how much my death would hurt my mother used to help me through. It really only helps to talk to people who really understand. I have found that grounding helps me now, if you know what that is. It gets you out of your head for a while which eases the torment.
Create space between you and your thoughts; the awareness aspect of you that registers thoughts
Therapeutic drugs can help start this process of creating space; meditating may help in the long term after that
Besides that, build on the three pillars: sleep, nutrition, exercise
Commit to an hour of no electronics everyday prior to sleeptime… increase water intake, eat more green stuff… take walks, run, bike, a exercise hobby, lift weights
strength comes from within, awareness remains
does it?
It gets better.