Daughters of angry fathers, how did you heal?

I didn’t, truthfully. I became an angry daughter.

Something visceral happens to me when people get loud and I cry very easily. I pretty much try to push it down as much as I can and pretend everything is ok. I never raise my voice and am prone to go silent treatment because I refuse to argue.

Therapy. I still get anxious around loud, angry men… but, therapy has helped me learn that he is gone now and the past can no longer hurt me.

I can’t handle men raising their voice.

I get very tense and freeze when there’s a sudden loud noise, like if something gets drooped on the floor or something. I hate it.

When I say my mind around my bf and it’s not the same as his, I always expect him to slap me all of a sudden or shout – he never does. And I never not expect it.

We don’t. We’re resilient which is also a hindrance. I also shut down if dad raises his voice. He’s currently terminally ill and in the hospital and shockingly we are having some of the best visits we’ve ever had because he’s sober and clear. Sick and dying though as well. I will have to see if I can “heal” after he passes.

I didn’t. I’m still panicking when I hear loud manly shouting or belt being removed (I used to get beaten using belt as a kid)
I have so much trauma. My father isn’t angry anymore, and he tells me he regrets his mistakes and I should move on from the past.

Cutting him out of my life .

Cut him out of my life

I haven’t properly spoken to him since 2019 and I refuse to communicate with him for the time being. We live in different countries, so it’s easy to avoid him. I’ll occasionally hear from him when he needs an ego boost or my mother wants to intimidate me into “listening” to her. I’ve basically removed him from my life completely and haven’t looked back.