I think there’s a whole lot more people in unhappy and sexless relationships than there are true asexuals.
As someone who believes their long term partner may be asexual, is there a best way to start that conversation?
Honestly, I’d just like to know one way or the other. As a highly sexual person myself, it’s been a weight on my chest for a while. It would be nice for us to both just understand where the relationship stands on sex explicitly.
Obviously I can’t diagnose what she is or isn’t, but I’ve done some reading on the subject, and a lot of things just scream “that’s her”. From the way she acts with regards to sex, to the things she’s told me.
I’m ace, and my bf isn’t (as far as I know) but he is very insistent that he’s only comfortable with what I’m comfortable with. I’ve never been with anyone before him, and he’s not had any serious relationship before me. He really doesn’t mind at all. Communication is key, and if it ever comes up again we’ll both be super open and honest with how we feel.
Just to illustrate what I mean, he had his hand in a spot that tickled me a bit and I kinda squirmed and told him it tickled, and he made sure I was okay with it, and I said yeah. He told me if I’m ever not to let him know, which I think is a good example of how it should be.
I’m very insistent that aces have every right to not want sex that non asexual people have to want sex. I am of the opinion that it isn’t the be all end all of relationships, and that you can have a perfectly healthy relationship without it as long as you communicate with each other. Obviously some people want it more than others (just like how some aces are okay with it and others like me are 100% repulsed by it) but that doesn’t mean that every single non asexual person NEEDS it to survive.
I hope that kinda clears some stuff up! I am very new to this kind of thing so it’s definitely worth it to read more experienced people’s posts too 😀
Also /r/asexuality is a great place, lots of informative posts there. It’s worth a browse if you’re more curious about the wondrous world of asexuality.
Maybe post this on r/AskLGBT for more answers 🙂
Do Asexual people masterbait?? Seriously