Granted. You are loved and deserve love
Granted. You decide to karma farm by making a monkey paw post where you comment to yourself 1000 times and it causes you to actually go insane
Granted, all of the matter that makes up your brain becomes profoundly stable and all chemical reactions cease.
…You are dead.
Granted. You live the rest of your life in peace and great happiness.
Edit: I missread the question my bad
Granted but your IQ is -1