I know you said you live in today-ville, but truthfully, you’re not. You’re living in your yesterday, you keep reliving the times when everything was good and you’re hanging onto that. If you truly lived in the present, then you’d know that your relationship has gone past its expiration.
You’ve tried to keep up your end of the relationship, whereas he has let his side drop. You’ve supported him long enough to let him go without guilt or fault. And honestly, if he can keep Amazon in business, then he’s not financially dependent as you think. He can probably afford an apartment and get by if he needed to.
You’re still hesitating because of the “what ifs”, but what if it never happens? Don’t let the hesitation push the both of you into more resentment. Maybe if you do it now, you can minimize the damage and remain friends. Idk, you’re call.
Girl, what….what the hell are you getting out of this? You’re paying for everything, doing all the chores AND getting mediocre sex?
Like this was physically painful to read, I’m just….flabbergasted. RUN, do not walk!!!
This is why so many relationships end in grad school. Maybe he’ll finish in December. Maybe it’ll drag through May.
OP – what do you think happens in Spring? Is he going on the job market? That isn’t less stress. Then he gets a job in random small town mid sized university IF he’s lucky. So what happens to your career? The house?
Your relationship sounds over. He’s not nice. He’s not supportive. He’s not attractive. He’s not good in bed. He’s not even able to keep up with chores. Why are you staying?
Honestly, he is just not being a good partner and finishing his degree isn’t going to change that. Being stressed about a PhD doesn’t make you selfish in bed or leave you unable to do chores. That’s iust him. Also, the stress isn’t going to magically disappear once his program is ended. The process of finding a good job with his shiny new PhD is probably also going to be stressful, and I doubt his jobs in the future are going to be low key and easy.
Do you have a partner or a child?