Just text him back that you’re not interested. I wouldn’t want to be with someone who had to “try” so hard like its some huge compromise to just be exclusive with me. Would rather be with someone excited to be there.
One thing I can say is that it’s much, much better he brought this up at this early stage. I’ve been in a couple of situations where a partner has brought up wanting to be in an open relationship long after we’ve both said we want to be exclusive.
So, I’m sorry this has happened, but I guess you need to try and figure out if he really will be happy with an exclusive relationship with you, or he’s just trying to placate you and actually does have an urge to be in an open relationship.
It could be that, as he explained, he’s been hurt in the past and felt this would be an easier path, but maybe he’s actually got over that notion and doesn’t *trulywant to be in an open relationship?
You know him better than us though so hopefully you’ll be able to figure that one out! Maybe talk to him about it again, given the advice you’ve received here?
I had a similar situation. My ex drove me into therapy (another story), but I talked with my therapist and we decided that a partner doesn’t necessarily owe us anything, it’s just their job to love us as much as we do.
If they can’t respect a boundary or if they present a dealbreaker, that’s fine. Just respect yourself enough to move on from the situation. A relationship is a two player game. Eventually you’ll find a like minded person who will be stoked to be exclusive. That’s the one you want to stay with.
Monogamy isn’t for everyone but he should have definitely mentioned much sooner what he wanted for his ideal relationship. Honestly I am just glad it was this early so it’s easier to move on and date others compared to suddenly wanting an open relationship several years into a relationship.
This is what pissing me off about those sort of guys before I get serious with someone I pretty much make it known what my boundaries are what I’m looking for and what I will and won’t accept and if they aren’t on the same page as me that as much as their nice and they have everything great on paper that I will not settle on less then I deserve he should of told you this in the very start so you knew what you where getting into it would of saved a lot of heartache and you could of moved onto someone else
He only changed his mind because he doesn’t want to lose you because he doesn’t want to be alone that’s why but if he truly cared he wouldn’t of sprung this on you out of nowhere.