I have a strict “no hooking up with coworkers” rule, well I broke it and I think things are about to go downhill because he farted in me, yes in me.

Throwaway for obvious reasons that are soon to come into the light lol. Sorry for formatting, I’m typing on mobile. Warning: the end gets a little graphic.

A little backstory, I (23F) work in a bar. It’s one of the biggest in my city, and has a pretty big staff. Despite the size, we’re all pretty close. However there’s a core group of about 10 of us that are best friends; myself, my 2 roommates and 7 guys. The guys are like our brothers, it makes me cringe to think about any of them in a sexual way, all except for 1. We can call him T. T is a good looking kid, he’s incredibly smart, kind, and so thoughtful- he’s overall just such a great guy. Out of all of us, T is the newest addition to the staff, he’s only been with us for about 8 months. When T started he had a girlfriend, and at the time that he did, I also was in a relationship. We were both experiencing rough patches in said relationships and became really close as we always confided in and sought advice from one another about what we were going through. I ended up breaking up with my boyfriend about 4 months ago, and have been enjoying being single. I bartended my way through college and if you’ve never worked in a bar, let me explain something to you- everyone hooks up with one another on the staff. It’s a “party” environment, at and after our shifts, and once the alcohol starts flowing it’s really easy to get involved with the people you’re spending a ton of time with. However, I have a strict rule of not hooking up with coworkers. I’ve seen how quickly things can go sideways and I’ve just never wanted to “shit where I eat”. Given the title, I think you know where this story is headed.

A few nights ago, we had a game night. T was in attendance. We all got pretty drunk and decided it would be a good idea to play hide and seek. Well T and I ended up hiding together in a little forest area behind the house. This was the first time any of us had seen each other in about 2 months due to self quarantining, so T and I started catching up as we were hiding. I asked him how everything was going with his relationship and if things had gotten better between him and his girlfriend. He told me that they broke up about a month ago. I told him how sorry I was, and if it meant anything, I thought the world of him and I know that he’ll find someone who also thinks that. T then took my face between his hands and kissed me. It was really unexpected, but passionate and sweet and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t like it. We ended up staying in our hiding spot for another half an hour just talking and kissing. He gave me butterflies, something I hadn’t felt in a really long time. We ended up going back to the house, and he ended up leaving as it was past midnight and he had work in the morning (his weekday corporate job). Before he left though he asked if I would come over and hangout at his place the following day while he did work from home. I agreed.

A little after lunch the next day, I went over to his place and it felt like we had been together for years. Being with and around him just came so naturally. He made me laugh, we could talk about anything and everything and I just genuinely enjoyed being around him. He asked me to stay for dinner and cooked me this delicious Salmon dish. The day had been amazing. We ended up having sex, and he asked me to stay the night with him; I did. Throughout the night we talked, had sex, talked more, laughed, everything. It was amazing. I went home the following morning feeling like the sun was shining out of my ass. I was so happy.

Fast forward to last night. T asked if he could come over and cook me dinner. Of course I agreed. Once more, he made me a delicious meal. We had wine, we played card games, it was a great night. I invited him to stay the night and he said yes. Well when we went to bed we started hooking up, things quickly got hot and heavy and we started having sex. About 5 minutes into it I heard a “pfffft”. I was pretty tipsy off the wine and didn’t know if I heard correctly or not. So I ignored it and didn’t say anything. 2 minutes later I hear another little “pfffft” but louder, and then another one. I quickly think to myself “Is that me? Am I queefing?” I knew I was tipsy but like there was no way I was drunk enough to not know whether the sound was coming out of my body or not. “Pfffft”, there it was again, louder and more aggressive this time. It was definitely a fart. T was farting. I was mortified. Before I could kindly ask him to remove himself from inside me he started to finish. “I’m cumming” he told me, and as soon as he began to explode inside me, the loudest, juiciest fart I had ever heard in my life exploded out of his asshole.

I immediately slithered out from underneath him and threw a T-shirt and panties on. I mumbled something about how I had to go to the bathroom and quickly left the room. I quietly, but quickly ran into the bathroom and just sat down on the floor. Something you should know about me- I hate farting. That and poop talk are so gross to me. I’ve always hated bathroom humor. Listen I get it, we all do it, and as much as I try to logically think through it, I can’t help but just be absolutely disgusted by it. So you can imagine my horror as someone dumped their load into me while simultaneously letting out the biggest butt trumpet tune I had ever heard. I was mortified. Alas I couldn’t hide in the bathroom forever, and I didn’t want him to know I was freaking out thus making him feel bad so I collected myself and walked back into my room. I decided I was just going to pretend nothing happened, fall asleep and just sort through what had occurred and my feelings about it in the morning.

As I opened the door to my room, I was greeted with another “PFFFFFFFT”. He was laying in my bed, still fucking farting. I guess the expression on my face gave away my disgust because he GIGGLED and sheepishly said “Haha sorry, I’m really gassy”. If it were anyone else, I would have told them to get the fuck out of my house right then and there. But T was my friend, and I put myself in this situation when I decided to sleep with a coworker/friend, so I quite literally laid in the bed that I had made for myself. I mumbled something about how it was fine, that I had a headache and just wanted to go to sleep.

This morning he tried to fool around before he had to leave for work but I pretended to be hungover and too nauseous to do anything. He kissed me goodbye, told me to “sleep good for him” (cringe), and text him later. Well it’s later and I still haven’t texted him. I don’t know what to do. I know it’s childish that I’m so grossed out by the farting but I can’t help it. Any sexual attraction I had to him is GONE. Vanished. Amelia Earhart style.

I don’t want to hurt his feelings, because he is my friend and he is such a great guy but like what do I do? I don’t want to ghost him, he deserves better than that, but I also don’t want to have to break it down for him that his loose butthole caused me to just be absolutely disgusted by him. I truly have no idea what to do. Please help.

Edit: For all you roasting me saying to grow up over farting- it’s not the act itself that bothered me so much. Like I said, everyone does it, yeah it grosses me out, but that doesn’t mean if someone does it in a normal setting I can’t get over it and move on. It was the fact that he was INSIDE me and did it so many times and then did it again afterwards rather than excusing himself to the restroom or just another fucking room for Christ’s sake. Also I apologize if the title is misleading. While yes he did not back his anus into my hooha and play his symphony directly into me, it was close enough to it to sure feel like the farts went inside me.

Edit #2: Some of your are very concerned with letting him finish inside of me and therefor it somehow makes my disgusted-ness from the farts invalid? We used protection, so… fuck off for 400? Even if we hadn’t… still fuck off.