first time poster so hopefully i followed all the rules. i’m really scared. idk if i’ll get into trouble so if anyone has any legal advice please let me know. i met him 9 months ago through a discord server. one of my friends [15F] was in it so i decided to join. i was in one of the channels and there were several people talking all at once. he messaged me and we talked about the most random things. we bonded really fast. talked about ourselves and turns out we live in the same city. my parents are divorced. my brother is in college so i don’t see him as much anymore. i’ve always felt lonely and i have trouble connecting with people. i felt like he was that one special person i finally connected with.
after 5 months of talking online, he brought up the idea of us “hanging out” and i was scared a bit. i’ve heard about abductions and all these scary things, but i also really wanted a friend. my mom wasn’t home and my brother was either at his dorm. my mom was working from 8AM to 9PM so i had a lot of time. anyway, he picked me up and we hung out at his house. at first i was really nervous because anything could’ve happened but we ended up having sex for the first time. he kept telling me he loved me and that i’m pretty and mature. when we were finished he cleaned me up.
after that, he dropped me off home before my mom was gonna be home. i felt so conflicted and there were many emotions going through me. i felt grossed out but he also said he loved me so i didn’t know what to do. i wasn’t answering any of his calls/texts for a few days because i was still processing that through my head. eventually, i told him i felt off about the entire thing. he said that if i loved him i’d go with it and i really wanted to date him so i did. i started to sneak off more and more.
he’s been a secret for months until now. my brother and i were talking. i don’t erase my messages with people. anyway, i went to the restroom, and when i came out, my brother had my phone in his hand and i started to freak out like crazy. he looked furious and asked me who this boy was. i broke out crying and eventually told him everything. he wants to report my boyfriend to the police and i’m scared. idk what to do. my mom is at her office working and she’ll eventually find out. please help.
What he did was called grooming. Most likely he broke laws pertaining to statutory rape and could face serious criminal charges. You need to come forward and immediately break contact with this individual. Your brother is right and regardless of your actions, your brother will probably involve the authorities.
If you are conflicted on how he feels about you, remember that when you said you were unsure and felt off about it, he guilt tripped you into continuing with the relationship and sexual activity. That is. It the acts of someone who loves you.
Honestly, your brother is right.
While the age gap is concerning enough the biggest red flag that screams predator is him telling you that if ‘you loved him you’d just go along with it.’
No, you DO NOT have to go along with it if you don’t feel comfortable and judging by your whole post you really don’t. You even stated you feel grossed out!
Please, don’t defend this man. He willingly knows he’s exploiting you, let your brother go through with going to the police.
OP, you won’t want to hear this, but please report this man to the police. I know it’s hard to understand when someone makes you feel good, feel loved, and all of the wonderful things that you probably felt when you were talking with him.
But what this man did was very, very bad. There is a good reason that doing what he did was against the law. There is a reason you felt grossed out. And there is a reason this discord dude took advantage of someone who is 15 and lonely.
Please report him and don’t feel guilty about it for a second. Then, take the time you need to process all of your feelings about what is happening, because I can only imagine how difficult this is for you.
You have a good brother. You should listen to him.
Have you ever watched To Catch a Predator? Because this is how most of those stories went.
That’s pedophilia, your brother is right to want to call the police. You met this guy 9 months ago, you weren’t dating prior to him turning 18 and even then that’s really sketch. I know you’re scared and confused, but that’s exactly the reason why a 21 y/o adult regardless of age shouldn’t have any kind of mature relationship with anyone under the age of 18