If he was “all in” with you, he wouldn’t be coordinating his backup plan behind your back. Dump this loser.
Well, sounds like his “commitment” to your relationship is iffy at best. As I’ve often said, “what you permit, you promote”.
If a person has probable cause in their reasonable state of mind to snoop, I think it advisable to do so and feel no guilt for doing it. It only confirms your suspicions OR makes you feel silly once it is clearly seen that you were mistaken. In this case, now you know he’s a “smuck” and can accept that or move on (I hope you choose the latter).
I like to know what I’m dealing with so I can make good decisions and take care of myself. I don’t consider looking at your boyfriend’s phone out of bounds. This is just me tho.
If he was loyal, you would know and make plans accordingly. You know he’s not loyal based on what you have learned, so now you can move forward using this knowledge.
It definitely sounds like he’s not very invested in your relationship, if he says something Ike that, clearly there’s a big chance that you won’t last with him. He may not even try very hard. You’ll probably be the one to carry the relationship.
This is the end of the relationship cuz from here on out, your trust is broken, you are hurt and I don’t see you coming back from this without like some huge gesture.