Have you ever had an ex die after you were no longer together? How did it affect you? How did you heal?

My ex died about two years after we broke up. It was a super shitty situation. I had broken up with him because he had started getting out of control with drugs and alcohol and didn’t seem interested in getting help. He was a really great guy when I met him, but he slowly started changing and became someone I didn’t want be be around at all.

After we broke up, he started using meth and it was a very rapid downfall from there. He completely lost his mind. Was in and out of jail and just turned into a typical tweaker criminal. Very sad. He was in grad school and had a pretty great life just a year before.

I had to block all contact with him for obvious reasons, but word of his death did eventually reach me. Originally I was told he overdosed and later I heard rumors that he was actually shot. I’m still not sure and honestly I don’t care to know. I prefer to remember him as I knew him before, not as a crazed addict. The grief was…. Weird. He had pretty much been dead to me for over a year, so word of his actual death didn’t shock me. I mostly just felt terrible for his mother and brother, who loved him very much.

After that, I did not fuck around with any man who even had a hint of drug or alcohol abuse. They are simply too unpredictable. Overall, a valuable lesson that I’m grateful for.

I dated very briefly one of my bestfriends when I was 17. I moved far away but we continued our friendship, talked for hours on the phone, wrote letters, emails. The only time I went home in 12 years, I very briefly and stupidly dated another one of our friends. He was extremely hurt, and very mad at me. After my trip home, where our entire friend group including him hung out for summer albeit him angrily, he never talked to me again. I could have admittedly tried harder, but I didn’t.

He was just out of boot camp in Germany maybe when we were 20, and he realized he didn’t want to be in the army. To get out he in his words made a very half hearted attempt to commit suicide, they let him have one phone call after, he called me. I was always his person. About 2 years ago now, I get the call, he killed himself for real this time.

I feel like I’m not allowed to share my feelings about him, with our friends, or his brother. There is a void where a person used to be. The only reason I haven’t deleted facebook is because I like to go back and read all our messages from time to time.

I just found out that a guy I dated briefly died a couple of months ago. It came as a shock as when I was with him, he was super healthy and fit and ran marathons and things like that. A mutual friend told me that he died after a long battle with cancer, and it was hard to align that with the man I’d known.

I dated someone for three years in high school and when we were about twenty he passed away in a dirt bike accident. We weren’t friends when he passed, but he wanted to get back together and our last conversation was me telling him it would never, ever happen. His parents were neighbors with our family friends, so we knew about it ASAP.

I started work at 7am and my mom texted me and told me. It took me all day to process as work, and as soon as I was leaving I broke down. I still get sad sometimes. He missed out on so much and really only ever dated me. I still see his family/friends around town and it’s just weird. That’s the best way I can explain it for me.

I dated this guy for a few months and it was probably one of the most toxic relationships I’ve had. I ended all communication with him when things ended. A few years passed and he apologized and wanted to show me how he’s changed and take me on a date but that never happened ‘cause I honestly was just looking for any reason to not speak with him again.

Fast forward to the end of December 2019, I get a text from my friend saying that his brother shot him and he died at the hospital. Initially, I was shocked, but not really sad. I felt like it would be fake for me to act like I was super upset when I didn’t want much to do with him. It wasn’t until I went to his funeral that it really hit me that he’s gone.